when they are broken.

right now i want to post about christmastime and that is only four days away and the fun things we are doing to celebrate. but my heart is too heavy. its been a tough week with lots of heart break. not for me personally but in my community and friends. and its like a ripple effect. it hurts me because it hurts my heart to see my friends so broken. sometimes i forget that shit happens. yes i just said shit. and it happens no matter if its christmastime or not. but because it is christmastime and it is supposed to be such a joyful time that makes it worse. last week three girls from the school i lead younglife at were in a wreck. one was put on life support and two days later was taken off and passed away. and it has broken the community of hardin valley and shattered our high school friends. especially the other two girls in the wreck. mostly the one driving. no one should ever have to live with that burden. especially a high schooler. on sunday the administration opened the school for kids to just come and be together. to talk together and pray together and cry together. to ask questions and to be sad and to be mad and even to laugh together. i am so blessed to have been put in that community and in that school with an administration that is kind and compassionate and loves their students so well. they brought in all of the guidance counselors and invited the young life leaders to come and be there. so we did and to be honest some of us were scared. we knew we would have to face something like that but i didnt know it would be so soon. we were told "not if, but when, tragedy strikes it is our job as younglife leaders to be present for kids" and thats what we did. it wasnt exactly comfortable and it definitely wasnt fun. but we did it because thats where jesus wanted us. thats what he has called us to do. to step into their lives. to really step in even in the mess and hurt and meet them where they are like he so faithfully does for us. we went and we sat in silence and the kids just sat and stared at each other. amidst the silence, in walked the other two girls from the wreck. one of which has lost her sight. other kids began to gather around them and the only sound that could be heard was crying. and it tore up my heart. finally one of the guidance counselors who is also a yl leader gathered up her boldness and asked them if they would like to pray together. and two kids stepped up and led one of the most beautiful prayers i have ever heard. it was beautiful because the lord brought it from the ashes. he really does make beautiful things out of dust. after that rachel asked them to tell their favorite thing about their friend that died and funny stories about her. and they did and then there was the most precious sound of laughter. but what i saw then was the hardest part. they were laughing and in an instant their faces would go blank. no emotion. numb. they are broken and they are mad and i think they are really confused. why would their friend be taken? the other two girls in the wreck never said a work. they never smiled and they never laughed. it was like they were there but they werent really there. its going to be a long healing process for them. for everyone i think. but i am glad we got to be there with them. to pray with them and cry with them and laugh with them. we are called to be there with them when life is good and fun. we are called to be there to with them in the pits and the peaks of life. we are called to be there with them when they are broken and in shambles. we got to be the hands & feet of jesus and i think that is all we can ask for. please pray for our high school friends. as they begin to ask questions and heal. and that maybe they will seek jesus in this. and pray for the girls families. as the heal too. and maybe they will seek jesus too.

sunday my neighbor called to tell us that her nephew was killed in a car accident. he was only 13 and was a twin. the mom & both boys were in the car. they are broken. especially the brother. his whole life he has had not only a brother but a twin and now he doesnt. pray for them too. especially because it is so close to christmas.

today i found out that one of my great friends dad is on life support. just last night he was diagnosed with a brain tumor and was told there was nothing the doctors can do. so he is on life support until they choose to take him off. their world flipped upside down and in literally less than 24 hours their lives are forever changed. they said only a miracle can change things. so that is what we are praying for. its possible. but only the lord knows if that is his plan. i have been praying so hard for them. so incredibly hard. please do the same. please. they love the lord so deeply and i know they are falling on him but it is still breaking them.

i want to rejoice in this christmas season but in the last few days that has been kind of hard. i would imagine it is near impossible for all of these friends. so for now i will continue to pray hard for my dear friends. and i will rejoice in this season and rest in what the lord has blessed me with.